i am what’s wrong with this economy

Today I’m wearing a pair of jeans that fits. This may not mean much to many of you, but I have this problem with money where I feel guilty if I spend it. Money, to my mind, loooooooooves to live in the safety of the bank. If I separate it from my checking account, in my head I hear the screams of a chimpanzee being torn apart by a hyena. And if I separate it from my savings account? You don’t even want to know.

But I managed to pass my debit card (no credit card for me!) over the counter of an actual, retail store this past weekend and in exchange I have a NEW PAIR OF JEANS. It’s weird cuz I can feel them, which I can’t with my jeans, since they are usually at least a size too big.

I’ve tried to talk to my older brother about my problems with money when he calls me from his iPhone on one of his weekly snowboarding jaunts. For some reason, he can’t relate.

Now that I have been spared the opportunity to deliver my money to Brooklyn College like so much frankincense and myrrh, though, I’m thinking I can spend it on other things that might make me happy. My brainstorming has produced pitiful results, from lack of practice, I think:

– increase Netflix subscription from one movie at a time to TWO
– get cable (??)
– yoga
– acupressure/massage
– more jeans that fit. And maybe skirts!
help keep this guy from getting elected

And here I begin to flail and sputter, my imagination overloading. What splurges have greatly increased your happiness?

2 thoughts on “i am what’s wrong with this economy”

  1. -owning the awesome movies you’ll want to revisit

    -soft cheese and ripe avocado in your refrigerator ALL THE TIME

    -a real espresso machine (i don’t know if you’re a coffee drinker, but god, espresso machines are awesome)

    -burberry trench

    i mean, i know where i’m going to spend the next free 8-10 thousand dollars i get (i.e. awesome new computer setup) but i’m happy to keep offering suggestions

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