the phoenix this week bordered on ridiculous. two articles on a spread read “beer healthier than milk, PETA says” (featuring an actual scientist verbally hitting his head against a wall) and “sperm is an anti-depressant.” the second, which argues that women who have unsafe sex are happier than their more cautious counterparts, was an import from a new york paper. while i couldn’t track down the original article, i did find an intelligent, amusing reaction to it. the idea that women, after reading the phoenix, will throw all their condoms in the trash, shout “happiness over health!” and embrace their new protection-free, giddy lifestyle, would infuriate me — except that i’m so damn well-skooled in the ideas of natural selection.

happy halloween, folks. and if you happen to be someone i care about, please, choose milk.

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