On March 20th, you will hear from me as to whether I have good news to share. If I have bad news, you will find me beating myself to death with one of Mr. Ben’s African drums, or perhaps trying to slide behind the refrigerator to die unnoticed like my hamster did when I was little.
My book, my crazy beloved stab at a book, is going out to editors at 13 publishing houses today. This means, I am told, its fate will be decided in a month, if not before then. I can’t tell you which houses, in case I’m not allowed to, but YOU’VE HEARD OF THEM. Oh mercy. Perhaps I will fall apart at the joints while I wait. Today I’ll lose a foot; tomorrow the tip of an index finger.
Sometimes my brain rushes ahead of me and I can picture the New Yorker‘s short, disdainful blurb in its May 2010 edition: “Although this young author’s premise shows some originality and imagination, ultimately the book fails to live up to the expectations generated by the idea. Not mean enough to be satire or absurd enough to be farce, A,AoG lingers in a kind of limbo of its own making.”
This is for real!
I will try to remember to put on pants today. Let’s see if I can do it.
just try to get your pants on before we come over. you have several hours to work up to it.
actually i’ve overachieved — i have on TWO pairs right now.
Same fate happened to my many hamsters. Also, the dad ate a bunch of the kids
You’re supposed to be fantasizing about that Pulitizer, not about a hypothetical devastating review. Can I get some glass half empty, extra empty?
writing scathing reviews is way more fun!
hamsters are useless but wow, i didn’t realize they were useless *cannibals*.
wohoo! your book’s getting published!
if you can write mediocre reviews in advance, i can celebrate in anticipation… (:
i have total faith in you and your writing talent. seriously. i always have.
you are all so wonderful. thank you.
your book is amazing and those editors are going to fall all over themselves trying to get at it. i can’t wait to host you on the seattle leg of your book tour. xoxoxo.
-stef