have i mentioned how bizarre it is to live w/o a working watch or a mirror? we have little shoulders-up mirrors but no full length ones, nothing that gives you a sense of how you look. just wandering around the barn becomes easier, then — you don’t have to worry about running into a reminder that you’re sloppy or tired or half-dressed. but before one ventures to the outside world, it helps to be reassured that you’re decent. all i have are people’s impressions, and even the most honest folks surely can’t be counted on to be that objective … *sigh* this just stems from the fact that i’m wearing a shirt becca bought me and i’m feeling self-conscious.
last nite joel, a friend of his, and i made a wonderful makeshift dinner. since we’re nearly out of groceries and our fuses are still faulty, we did a lot of improvising (borrowing yogurt, substituting soymilk to make half the dish vegan, baking in the toaster) but it was fun and it came out well. so far i’ve only been to sharples, the dining hall, once. i suppose once i’m outfitted w/ points that number will rise — being moneyless limits my options. but making actual food, like last nite’s tandoori and curry and spinach and stuff, kicks ass.
two more classes this morning, stat and american politics, both of which seem all right. politics actually seems like it’ll rock; prof has a very dry sense of humor and a clear liberal bent. good mix. i have quakerism in a minute, then after my only substantial break today (2 hours), a meeting w/ the foreign study office guy and then film from 7 – 10. christ. on the non-scholastic side of things, i’m halfway thru Crying of Lot 49 so that i’ll have some pynchon under my belt. and i wrote my first film review of the semester last nite, on ghost world. i fussed more than i usually do b/c it’s number one both for su wu, my new editor, and for this new semester.
i should just walk around wearing pup tents, never look up, and never try anything. i am way too ridiculously afraid of being judged.